The Glass is Half Full

Her bags are packed, medical consents are signed, and the tiny schedule of her daily activities is printed off. It's come time to say good-bye to my morning snuggles, my endless hours of staring at her, and (let's be honest) my Pinterest browsing, Bravo-watching way of life I've know for the past twelve weeks. Maternity leave is over. [insert tears] But I'm trying very hard to keep my positive outlook on why this will ultimately be okay.
1) Hannah gets to spend time with her Aunt Willa (my beloved and very trustworthy sister). If you're wondering why we call her "Willa", I have no idea, but if you find out let me know. Back to the topic. Hannah will still get her morning snuggles, she'll still be sung to several times a day,  and she will be so very, very loved there. My nephews are excited that "Baby Hannah will finally be THEIR baby" I suspect there will be a day when Hannah doesn't want to come home from Willa's. 
2) Justin will get the chance to learn Hannah too. From the moment Hannah was born, Justin's been a great father and so smitten by his little girl, but with Hannah nursing exclusively, we've really had the bonding moments. This will be their chance to get to know each other.
3) I have a reason to wear a bra for longer than 2 hours. 
4) It's only three days a week. The added bonus of a nurses' schedule. 
4) I went to school for a long time to do what I do. And while it's a love/hate relationship with about 80% of it being hate, I do love being a nurse.  And I'm pretty good at it. Not excellent, but good. 
5) I get to have adult interaction. Even if some of my interactions are with less than happy family members and puking patients, I still get to talk like an adult. 
6) My evenings will be 1 million times sweeter when I get to see my little red-headed beauty at the end of the day. Her perfect smile and pointy cowlick will be waiting for me when I get home.

So here goes nothing, right? I can do this. I can. I can. 

Single Moms

       I believe in fate. I believe that from the moment God created us He knew exactly what paths we would take. That being said, I know with certainty, that God did not make me a single mom for a reason-I am not strong enough to survive it. One week after my dreaded return to work, Justin left for a business trip to NYC. In the middle of a bathroom renovation, Hannah deciding sleep was for the birds, working 12 hour days, and poor cable service- I was alone. I had a 4am wake up call and a bedtime that provided me with an unsafe amount of sleep. I think I went three consecutive meals without eating and completely forgot that water is a necessity until I got a little lightheaded. I forgot my cell phone at home and left my pump at work. I cried and Hannah laughed at me. I called Justin, but he was enjoying unlimited cocktails with "colleagues" in a loud bar and couldn't hear me. Morale of the story- I did not like it one single bit. A huge shot out to all the single moms out there- you deserve you're own special week of gifts and attention. This stuff is no joke. And a shot out to my lovely husband (he doesn't read my blog anyway) I'm sorry if I've ever taken you for granted. You're amazing. 

A Little More Special

      Most recently, I attended the funeral of a young woman who left behind two small child. The loss of this particular woman was felt nationwide. She was loved-- there is nothing I have ever been so sure about. I am also certain she loved like no other. As one of her friends spoke, she said "She always made things just a little more special".  Those words clung to me.   That's exactly the kind of mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend, and stranger I want to be. Someone who makes things just a little more special. I want to make sure people know how much I care, how much I would give up for them, and how much they mean to me.
    My promise from this day on is to do just this. Go the extra mile, take the extra minute, pay it forward, and ask nothing in return.